


Help

by Calliope (Frostbite122)



Category: Original Work
Genre: Gen, Original Fiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-09
Updated: 2016-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:22:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27411904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Frostbite122/pseuds/Calliope
Summary: The Scholastic Book Fair is coming to school and my seven year old self eagerly awaits for it to arrive.





	Help

The Scholastic Book Fair is coming to school and my seven year old self eagerly awaits for it to arrive. The teacher, passing out order booklets to her gaggle of first graders, explains that they are a separate book sale from the fair but the anticipation in the air doesn't waver. Pages rustle and a steady murmur of eager voices is heard, what looks interesting? Ooooh, that one looks cool! I leaf through the pages, glancing from book to book. The ones that catch my eye are circled. By the time I’ve looked through the entire booklet I have several circled and plan to convince my parents to let me get all of them. The bell rings and the order form is shoved into my backpack on the way out, crumpled but not forgotten.

I knew, in an abstract way, that I couldn’t get every book I wanted but, I’m seven years old and that doesn’t matter. That evening, with careful deliberation and the help of my parents, I narrowed down my selection of books. With order form filled out I come to school the next day with a smile on my face and proudly present it and a check to my teacher. On the way to my seat I fiddle with the twenty dollar bill in my pocket for the fair.

We line up single file, as orderly as a herd of eager seven year olds can, and follow the teacher to the library. The library, with the light streaming in through large ceiling windows and hitting the shelves, looks otherworldly. I stare distractedly at tiny dust particles dancing in the light as we approach the doors -- and sneeze, breaking the enchantment. The book fair is easily viewable now, cardboard shelves and tables filled with an endless collection of books and little toys and knick knacks. Gripping my twenty dollar bill, I glance from shelf to shelf with wonder.

Inside, finally! Kids break off and swarm the shelves, picking through whatever catches their eye and then rushing off to the next. Moving slowly, hands crossed behind my back and the twenty dollar bill still clenched in my fist, I scan the shelves. Several minutes pass and my fellow classmates start to trickle towards the librarian at the checkout table, items clutched close and grins on their faces. Another adult floats around helping the other kids and -- there it is! Up on the top shelf! Zeroing in on a thick red book with a red dragon on the cover, to my seven year old eyes it’s the best thing ever. Elation bubbling in my chest, crumpling my twenty dollar bill even more, this is the book I’m going to buy. Momentarily deterred by being unable to reach high enough to claim my prize I get the attention of the nearest adult, the same woman I earlier saw helping other kids. Pointing to my desired book, I ask “Can you grab the red book for me please?” The woman hesitates for a moment and after a brief pause she asks if I’m sure that’s the book I want. Eagerness falling slightly, I nod my head in confirmation, not sure why she hasn’t just grabbed the book for me. The woman, in a voice that was probably meant to be helpful, told me that the book was very thick, that it would be hard to read, that I wouldn’t like it. At every word my embarrassment grows and my cheeks redden. Staring at my feet, feeling very small and very upset, I nod my head absentmindedly. It seems to signal to the woman that I don’t need her help any more and she walks away to ‘help’ another kid. Rooted at the spot, I glance up at the red book with the red dragon. She can’t know that what she has said has embarrassed me, filled me with overwhelming feelings of self consciousness and doubt. No longer filled with elation, I continue to stare up at the book for a little longer. The teacher calls for us to line up again, it’s time to head back to class. Biting my lip, I take one last look at that red book with the red dragon. With my heart a little heavier and my twenty dollar bill still clenched in my hand I walk away.


End file.
